Part 2 of “short books, Long Shadows”
June 21, 2026
Glynwood Baptist Church, Prattville, Alabama
James Jackson, Pastor
Good morning, and Happy Father’s Day! Please open your Bibles to 3 John. In many Bibles, 3 John is one page. So here’s a handy tip: Open your Bible to Revelation 1, and then flip back 2 or 3 pages.
There’s a preaching cliché that’s been around for a long time that compares Mother’s Day to Father’s Day. The idea is that women come to church on Mother’s Day and get built up, but men come to church on Father’s Day and get beat up.
On Mother’s Day it’s all, “We honor you. We appreciate you. You’re a Proverbs 31 woman.”
On Father’s Day it’s more like, “Get off the couch! Share the remote! Lead your family! Act like men! Stand firm!”
Mother’s Day is the greeting card aisle at Target.
Father’s Day is the locker room at halftime.
But that’s not what we’re going to do today.
Because when we come to 3 John, we don’t find a lecture about what men ought to be. We find four portraits of four very different men. Three examples worth following, one example worth avoiding.
Here’s the truth:
Everyone’s becoming someone.
Day by day, decision by decision, habit by habit, we are becoming a certain kind of person.
And 3 John holds up the mirror and asks:
What kind of someone will I become?
Now, it’s Father’s Day, and the title of the sermon is “The man You want to be.” But everything we’re about to see applies to women as well as men. This is about character, not chromosomes.
Let’s read the entire letter together. It’s only fifteen verses, so if you are physically able, please stand to honor the reading of God’s word.
[read, pray]
1. Gaius: A Truthful Man (v. 1-4)
Let’s start with Gaius, the truthful man.
Before John tells us anything about what Gaius did, he tells us how he feels about him. In verse 1, he writes, “To the beloved Gaius.” Then in verse 2, he calls him “beloved” again.
That’s significant coming from John. Remember, this is the apostle who referred to himself in his Gospel as “the disciple whom Jesus loved.” Love is one of John’s favorite themes, but it is not a word he uses carelessly. John genuinely loves this man.
Why?
Because Gaius was the real deal.
John had received a report from a group he simply calls “the brothers.” These appear to have been traveling Christian missionaries or gospel workers who had visited Gaius and his church. When they returned, they told John what they had seen. They testified that Gaius was “walking in the truth.”
Notice they didn’t merely report what Gaius believed. They reported how Gaius lived.
That’s an important distinction.
Lots of people know the truth. Lots of people can argue the truth. Lots of people can post the truth on social media. Gaius walked in the truth. His beliefs and his behavior matched. His theology and his lifestyle told the same story.
Interestingly, when the brothers reported back to John, they testified to two things. In verse 3, they testified to Gaius’s truthfulness.
In verse 6, they testified to his love.
Those are the two great themes that run throughout John’s writings. Truth and love. Gaius understood that you need both. Truth without love becomes harsh and judgmental. Love without truth becomes sentimental and permissive. We’ll deal with this a lot more next week. Just know that for Gaius, truth and love walked hand in hand.
Third, Gaius was an example of generosity. These traveling missionaries had experienced that firsthand. Even though they were strangers, Gaius welcomed them. He opened his home. He supported their ministry. He worked on their behalf. In verses 7 and 8, John tells us they had gone out “for the sake of the Name,” accepting nothing from unbelievers. Instead, they depended on the generosity of fellow Christians like Gaius.
John says that when we support people like that, we become “fellow workers for the truth.” That’s a beautiful phrase. Gaius may not have traveled with these missionaries, but he partnered with them. He shared in their work. He invested in what God was doing through them.
There’s an important principle here that Christians sometimes forget: money fuels mission.
Now, don’t misunderstand me. The power behind the mission is the Holy Spirit. The message is the gospel. The mission belongs to Jesus. But throughout the New Testament, God accomplishes His mission through the generosity of His people.
These missionaries had gone out “for the sake of the Name.” They were preaching Christ. They were making disciples. They were planting churches. But they still needed food to eat, places to stay, and resources to travel.
Someone had to support the mission.
Gaius understood that. He may not have been the one preaching in the marketplace or traveling from town to town, but he knew that by investing in those who were, he became a fellow worker for the truth.
The same principle is still true today. Every time a missionary is sent, every time a church is planted, every time disaster relief volunteers deploy, every time a seminary student prepares for ministry, every time a child goes to camp and hears the gospel, someone has made it possible through their generosity.
Not everyone is called to go. But everyone can help send.
That’s why giving is never merely about paying bills. It’s about participating in the mission of God. Faithful Christians understand that their resources are not simply for their own comfort. They are tools God has entrusted to them for the advancement of the gospel.
Gaius understood that money could be transformed into ministry. And because he did, John says he became a fellow worker for the truth.
So let’s sum it up. Gaius was a man whose life matched his profession of faith. He walked in the truth, served others faithfully, and supported gospel work generously.
Men, that’s the kind of reputation worth pursuing. Not that people would say you’re successful, influential, wealthy, or important. But that the people who know you best would say, “He walks in the truth.”
2. Diotrephes: A “Me First” Man (v. 9-10)
Now let’s meet the second man in this letter. His name is Diotrephes. Who was this guy? Well, let’s start with a fun fact: His name means “nourished by Zeus.” Zeus was the chief of the Greek gods. So maybe it’s no surprise that Diotrephes acts a little entitled, and loves to put himself first.
What do we know about “Nourished by Zeus?” To be clear, John never calls Diotrephes a pastor, elder, bishop, or deacon. But there are a lot of hints from the text that Diotrephes was an influential leader within the church.
But he was a toxic leader
- He didn’t acknowledge John’s authority (v. 9). John indicates that he had written something to the church, but somehow Diotrephes prevented it from being shared.
- He talked “wicked nonsense” against John and other leaders,” apparently because he wanted to be the sole authority.
- Not only did he refuse the traveling missionaries, but he seemed to have the positional authority to prevent others from welcoming them, and even expel people from the congregation (v. 10).
We can’t say very much definitively, because this is the only place in Scripture we even hear about Diotrephes.
But we know one thing.
John says he “liked to put himself first.” The Greek word is philoproteuo, and you probably know enough Greek to put it together: philo— loves (Think Philadelphia— the city of brotherly love, or Philosophy— love of wisdom.
Then proteuo. What’s a prototype? The first of something.
So Diotrephes “philo-proteuo-ed” himself. He loved prominence. He loved having his way. He loved being in control.
That’s all history remembers.
Think about that for a moment. Two thousand years later, the one thing preserved in God’s Word about Diotrephes is that he loved being first. Men, what if that was your legacy? What if that was the theme of your funeral? What if the sentence engraved on your tombstone was simply, “He liked to put himself first”?
And it showed.
Notice the contrast between Diotrephes and Gaius.
• Gaius opened his home; Diotrephes closed the door.
• Gaius used his influence to advance the gospel; Diotrephes used his influence to advance himself.
• Gaius welcomed people; Diotrephes pushed them away.
• Gaius walked in the truth; Diotrephes lived for himself.
The tragedy is that Diotrephes probably didn’t wake up one morning and decide to become the villain of the story. Most people don’t. Self-centeredness has a way of disguising itself as leadership. It disguises itself as strength. It’s dressed up like conviction. It pretends it’s protecting what’s right. But underneath it all is a heart that says, “My kingdom come. My will be done.”
Men, every one of us faces that temptation. We face it at home, at work, and even at church. We all have a little bit of Diotrephes in us. The question is not whether we’ll have influence. The question is what we’ll do with it. Will we use it to serve others like Gaius, or will we use it to serve ourselves like Diotrephes?
John says in verse 11, “Beloved, do not imitate evil, but imitate good.” Then he adds, “Whoever does good is from God; whoever does evil has not seen God.”
Remember, everyone’s becoming someone. Are you becoming a Gaius, or are you becoming a Diotrephes?
3. Demetrius: A Respected Man (v. 12)
Then John introduces a guy named Demetrius.
Again, we know very little about Demetrius personally. There are other Demetriuses (Demetrii?) in Scripture—it was a pretty common name—but there’s no evidence to link this Demetrius to any of them.
What we do know is that Demetrius was a respected man. Verse 12 tells us that he had received a good testimony from everyone, including John himself.
There’s a common saying that you become the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Whether that’s scientifically precise or not, it captures an important truth: the people we admire, follow, and imitate shape who we become.
We learn how to be husbands by spending time with great husbands. We learn how to be fathers by spending time with great fathers. We learn how to lead by watching leaders. We learn how to follow Jesus by observing the lives of people who are following Him well.
Men, one of the most important takeaways for us this morning is this: Choose carefully the men you allow to influence you.
Let’s take a closer look at verse 12. John is doing something fascinating. A foundational principle in Jewish law was that “every matter must be established by two or three witnesses.” Jesus repeated that principle in Matthew 18, but it goes all the way back to Deuteronomy 19:15.
So follow me:
1. Demetrius received a good testimony from everyone (verse 12)
2. Demetrius received a good testimony “from the truth itself.” That’s an interesting phrase. What does it mean for the truth itself to testify on someone’s behalf? I think John means that Demetrius’s life matched the truth he professed. His character and his conduct lined up with his confession.
3. Demetrius received a good testimony from John
In other words, Demetrius’s reputation was established by multiple witnesses.
Men, that’s how character works. You can claim integrity, but eventually your life has to confirm it.
Demetrius was the kind of man whose character could withstand examination from every angle.
One detail in verse 12 is easy to miss. John says that Demetrius had “received” a good testimony from everyone.
He wasn’t writing his own recommendation letter. He wasn’t promoting himself. He wasn’t demanding respect. He wasn’t constantly reminding everyone of his accomplishments.
That reminds me of Proverbs 27:2: “Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips.”
And that is so counter-cultural. We are taught to market ourselves, promote ourselves, and make sure everyone knows how impressive we are. They call it “building your personal brand.”
Demetrius took a different approach. He simply lived a life worthy of respect, and over time respect followed.
Notice the contrast with Diotrephes.
• Diotrephes wanted to be first. Demetrius wanted to be faithful.
• Diotrephes sought prominence. Demetrius earned a good reputation.
• Diotrephes demanded recognition; Demetrius received it.
Men, there is a difference between being known and being respected. Plenty of people are known. Not everyone is respected. Demetrius was the kind of man whose character spoke so loudly that other people did the talking for him. Could that be said of you?
4. John: An “Elder”-ly Man (v. 4, 13)
There’s a fourth man in this letter, and it’s John himself. By this point, John was probably the world’s oldest Christian. He was the last surviving apostle. Most scholars date 3 John around AD 85–95, making it one of the last books written in the New Testament. So when he describes himself as “the Elder” in verse 1, he isn’t kidding.
But John isn’t just an elder in the sense that he’s old. He has become the kind of man the New Testament describes as an elder. Decades of following Jesus have produced wisdom, humility, faithfulness, and spiritual maturity. John isn’t just elderly; he’s elder-ly.
Come on—did you really think I could make it through a Father’s Day sermon without at least one dad joke?
Here’s what strikes me most about John. By this point he has accomplished more for the kingdom of God than most of us can imagine. He walked with Jesus. He witnessed the resurrection. He helped lead the early church. He wrote five books of the Bible.
But here, at the end of his life, John tells us what brings him the greatest joy.
And it isn’t any of those things.
“I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.”
- Not “I have no greater joy than seeing my books published.”
- Not “I have no greater joy than seeing my bass boat in the driveway.
- Not, “I have no greater joy than getting a birdie on the fifteenth hole.”
His greatest joy is seeing people he has invested in walking with Jesus.
That’s the heart of spiritual fatherhood. And honestly, that’s the heart of biblical manhood. A mature man doesn’t spend his life building his own kingdom. He spends his life investing in people who will outlive him.
After all these years, John’s greatest joy isn’t his accomplishments. It’s people. “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.”
That’s pure John. A lifetime spent loving God, loving people, and investing in the next generation of believers.
Men, I want to bring this to a close by asking you to consider some very pointed questions.
At the end of your life, you are going to have a bunch of “whats” and a bunch of “whos.” The whats are your possessions. Your trophies. Your accolades. Your titles.
But the whos are people. Your family. Your community.
Which one will bring you the greatest joy?
What you’ve accumulated?
What you’ve accomplished?
Or the people you’ve invested in?
The people you’ve helped walk in the truth?
The people you discipled?
The people you encouraged?
Who will be following Jesus twenty years from now because God used you in their life?
Because in the end, that’s the legacy John cared about. Not what he built. Not what he owned. Not what he achieved.
People.
People walking in the truth.
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